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[determinedest]

You've reached Frisk. If I'm not answering my phone, please leave a message or find me on the second floor, Room 12.

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Comments

[punful]

[Yeah. Tired. No wonder they all just want to rest. Want to disappear for a little while.]

[And it's true. This is a thousand times easier than it would be if they were face to face. Not that he particularly thinks talking about any of this was a good idea, or even a healthy one, but it's still...easier. Even if it means his thumbs are getting tired. In person they probably both would have frozen up or distracted themselves or changed the subject.]

heh

wonder if we'll ever figure it out.

[If there's any such thing as "better." Not "okay," not "easier," but actually "better." He gave up on better a real long time ago, but that doesn't mean that better in and of itself doesn't exist somewhere.]

no yeah i uh

maybe

i mean the offer in and of itself is nice

and you know you can always do the same

sometimes hearing it does help

even if we don't believe it

that's why papyrus helps so much

even when he doesn't realize he's doing it

[determinedest]

I don't know how he does it. I'm glad he does. I just don't know how he can always stay like that. Even in the worst moments.

He stills forgives me. He still believes in me and Chara.

I don't know what we did to deserve him.

[Sans probably thinks the same thing. It hurts that they can summon the thought so easily, and have so much difficulty banishing it in turn.]

Maybe we won't ever be okay. I don't know.

I don't know if I want to be okay. Do you have to want to be okay to be okay? Do you have to feel like you deserve to be okay to feel okay?

[punful]

i don't know either.

i mean. he has off days just like anyone.

but he overcomes them.

he just tells himself to be happy and positive and it works

i don't know how

[If Papyrus can do it, why can't Sans? Why can't Frisk and Chara? Why is it so, so hard to be happy and normal?]



none of us deserve him, that's for sure.





and i don't know

i don't think so

sometimes you catch yourself being happy and then remember how uh

not okay you were just a few hours ago or something

i think it just happens

maybe deserving has nothing to do with it

it sure is easy to knock yourself back down with that mindset though

isn't it

[determinedest]

[They'd asked him, once. Why is he happy all the time. Why does he get to smile and enjoy himself even though his brother only kills for him, never dies for him, never sacrifices for him. Isn't that what love is? Isn't that what love is supposed to be? Brutal, and painful, and agonizing?

They -

They do this because they love you.

They do this because they care about you.

If you weren't such a horrible child, maybe they wouldn't have to punish you for it, but they love you, you know they do, you know they - ]

Why is it so much easier to hate yourself? Is that just taking an easy way out?

I'm sorry. I know you don't know the answers any more than I do. I guess we just

We all get it. All of us. We all kind of know how it is. So if we're going to be like this, at least we're not alone, right?

That's something, isn't it?

[punful]

yeah


yeah, i guess it is.